Because I Love You .

I'm dying of boredom here. Just exited Audition after leveling up. I must admit, it's pretty addictive. :P Anyway, on Saturday, Sam and me made muffins and scrambled eggs. The muffins weren't a sucess, because our microwave oven wasn't the best and some of the muffins ended up burnt, but those that were still alright, tasted nice. The scrambled eggs was successful, but unfortunately it was insufficent. I heard that eggs make people smarter/increase someone's brain __ ? So maybe Sam and me are slowly gaining intelligence. Hahaha.

LMS was boring, infact I didn't expect it to last only for a few minutes, lots of classmates/sec 1 mates were online during that period of time, so I was busy chatting away. Initially, I wanted to doze off to slumberland, but after doing the LMS, I felt widely awake and just went to play Audition. I'm guessing that I'm heading the bunks earlier since Sam and me slept at 5am+ last night, due to brainstorming of fanfictions and Audition.

Now that we're having a short break, I'm starting to miss school hell lot. The way they behave, the way the classroom look like and how Eme, YJ, Sam and me would meet up during recess and after lunch to chillax. The end-of-the-year holidays are coming soon, I'm not sure if I'm looking for it. I just hope that no one gets depromoted.

I'm feeling alot alot alot happier now, because I chatted with him on MSN today and he ringed me up on something. Even though he sounded a little weird on MSN, with his crazy buddy (who you all might NOT want to know, for your own sake) . Sometimes, I wonder, if I'm so angry at him at the last few posts, why aren't I angry when I talk to him ? When he sends an IM, I feel blissful. Maybe I just can't stay angry at someone for too long, especially if it's someone special.

I would no longer say that I give up hope on him or he doesn't like me. Because right now, I'm not too sure myself. There might be a possibility of him not repaying the feelings back, but that's ok. At least we are still closer in terms of friends/classmates. I feel that if I continue say that I should give up on him, it would only make him like him more. Crazy, doesn't it sound? But, that's me. I won't give up till I really hear him say out from his lips that he doesn't feel the same way.

I believe that as long as we're alive, hope exists and at this moment, I'm feeling extremely hopeful now ! :D I don't care what obstacles that come infront of me. Because this time, I'll be a stronger person. I won't be so sensitive and just let something small effect me greatly.

My brother's going to come home soon, somehow I have the feeling I want to fetch home, take a good look at my Primary School because it has already made a huge impact in my life. Last night, I was remincising the moments shared between my primary 6 crush and I and I just started smiling to myself. Even though right now, we still stay in contact via MSN, we don't talk as we do so openly in the past. Distance is something that affects a relationship strongly, so I'll be the one to make the first move and keep this relationship stable.

I still remember the time when my primary 6 crush gave me my birthday present. Strangely, I feel the same way I do a year ago. Even though the present he gave me, made me sick the next way and start growing a strange dislike for chocolates, I still appreciate it to the bottom of my heart. Guys don't usually make the first move to give girls present, especially when they're not too close friends yet. It so happens that he was the leader of the class and I, was the assistant, so we bonded alot, but then again, I was really happy that he took the effort to look up my birthday on the name list. So yeah, I hope I muster the courage to say this to him when he turns online - Thank you.

I'm not sure if I have knocked this barrier that keep me from talking so openly to my current crush, but I hope I made him think that I'm not too shy. Folks, I know I'm shy, and in school, I build up a strong front infront of classmates and friends, but what lies beneath it is just this timid shy girl and I'm going to change her into someone much stronger. Believe me when I say that ! :D

So yeah, I hope everyone is enjoying their short break ! I'll see you guys in school on Thursday, take care and Sayonara ! :)